Sunday, January 25, 2015

Christmas Card 2014


What do the World Cup, World Series, the Battle of Ticonderoga, and the Princess Buttercup Parade all have in common? Answer: Each was reenacted in our backyard this year in full detail and majesty. Damage Report: 1 dead 50 year old tree, one large earthen swimming pool converted into a fort, 3 cases of sickle-cell genocitocis, 1 large broken window, 3 smaller broken windows, 17 hours of squirrel mediation (in Spanish of course), 125 earthen cannonballs, 2,552 balls over the fence (apologies to our neighbors), 11,294 tears (Mostly at the Buttercup Princess Parade), and 956 minutes in timeout (Also mostly attributed to the Buttercup Princess Parade).

Taylor (10) is very competitive and loves to play games. At the beginning of the year the games in the backyard were normal, like baseball and soccer; however as the year progressed, more and more bats and balls were lost over the fence or surrendered to the squirrels and the kids had to improvise. The most recent game involved hitting a Frisbee with a lacrosse stick and running bases whilst imaginary runners from previous at-bats advanced in imaginary glory until 3 outs were somehow accrued by the other team. (I have watched this many times and still have no clue how they determine when an imaginary player is tagged -out, but I doubt even Congress could rival the arguments that have ensued). Taylor as inventor of the games also claims to have full governing authority as to the rules. Besides being the inventor of games, and struggling with dictator-of-a-small-country-syndrome, Taylor has immersed himself in soccer, books, piano and school. He is on-track to complete the Old Testament next year along with the complete works of Brandon Mull, Jules Verne, John Flanagan, and Calvin & Hobbes.

If Justin (9) was a Greek God, he would be Gryllasazi, God of Survival. I am not sure how to explain this kid. He has got a solution for everything; and it most often involves duct tape, paracord, and tree branches. He keeps a survival backpack fully provisioned at all times at the foot of his bed for 24-7 emergency response. I will not catalog what all is contained in that backpack, but I am sure it would not be allowed through TSA. He still is passionate about running and has completed the equivalent of 2 marathons this year in his school’s run club. He has also been bitten by the soccer bug and has heated debates whether Messi or Neymar Jr. will be the next superhero to join Marvel’s Avengers (although Kate is hotly contesting that Elsa deserves that distinction). Because soccer fights crime!

If you haven’t figured it out, grass is afraid to grow in our backyard. Conner (7) has recently been recognized for his discovery of genocitocis (nervous grass syndrome). It is a neurological disorder found in the grasses of backyards with young boys. It is characterized by acute anxiety, loss of appetite, and depression. Conner is working on some electrolyte grass therapy and is hoping to present his findings for the benefit of grasses everywhere. Conner is the keeper of Holiday traditions in our home. Each morning when he wakes up, he goes through the house and turns on the Christmas tree lights, village lights, and outside lights. He is continuously singing Christmas music and reminds us about the joy of Christmas from a child’s eyes. Conner also started cross country this year with his brothers. He is uncommonly fast and it’s embarrassing how easy he makes it look.

Kate (5) is Emotional Chaos. Don’t get me wrong, her emotions are under perfect control; it is what she does to the emotions of everyone around her that can be chaos. She is an emotional temperature dial in our home. If she is happy, our home is happy; but if not…..WATCH OUT! Luckily she is happy most of the time. She loves to play with her dolls and now has a contingent of 13 or so that she tucks into bed with her at night. She is very methodical and in perfect juxtaposition she is also very artistic. She loves to draw, color, sing and run fast. And she has one of those smiles that steadily ties ropes from her Dad’s heart to her little finger.

If Love was an element in the periodic table, Cooper would be the perfect specimen. Spend 10 minutes with this kid and you will understand why God commands us to be like little children. He is so loving and his fire-cracker personality is so contagious. He is a non-stop chatterbox and demands FULL ATTENTION when he is talking. I think his number one goal in life is to extinguish unhappiness in the world. It would take a hardened Ebenezer Scrooge not to laugh generously at has body-builder dance moves choreographed to the song “What Does the Fox Say”.

Cami (25) is still perfect. I can’t say enough about how amazing she continues to be. A perfect 10 for 2014.

Hope 2015 fills your home with joyful moments and genuine smiles.

Love, The Snows

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